Female friendships are complicated

women friendship

The daily update from the world of literature. Today: Dana, winner of the Prize, wants to break a lance for young people’s books. One thing has been with them for many years.

October 17th, morning update: “Female friendships are complicated”

Which book changed you? This is what the “Books for Life” video series is all about. In it, writers, intellectuals and other exciting people tell about a book that has left their mark on them and what memories they associate with it.

The writer Dana provides the proof: Even books with ugly covers can be fondly remembered. And that even for years: for “Books for Life”, the author , who was nominated for the Bachmann Prize and awarded the Prize, chooses a novel for young people that she keeps thinking about.

October 16, morning update: Ben opens up to Gery

She never stood in the “centre” of Ben’s life , Gery knew that early on. From winter 1921 to autumn 1922 she and the poet were a couple. After that, they managed the feat of remaining inclined to one another until Benn’s death. Ben was the analyst , she the generous, clever (studied and doctoral degree) and warm-hearted, pecuniary clammy like himself, without any writing ambitions – how extremely pleasant! He opens up to her in mocking notes and “big” letters, private, political, autobiographical, and as seldom sympathetic as he asks about her adventurous life.

The volume begins with 29 partly tempting, partly rabid Benn letters full of humour, full of sadness. “Don’t bathe too long!” He warns, followed by depressing insights: “The whole of life for each individual is economic galleys.” He describes his intellectual “situation” as “completely decentralized”, “one pukes at oneself”.

He explains in detail how he stood up for Hitler, only to withdraw into silence. Gertrud saves the bundle despite countless moves. After the war she sent 60 care packages from the USA, plus many letters, to which he replied gratefully and informatively. He declares September 6th to be “Trudchentag”, but texts like Edition are worth a glass every day. Gisela Trahms

October 15th, lunchtime update: Stefan on his overwhelming encounter with Peter

I know, I know. When you talk about Peter these days , the first thing that inevitably comes up is this dreary controversy about Serbia , an outburst of anger that Pete knows only too well. Which is why there was some contradiction when the Nobel Prize was later awarded . Why he accepted this price, in contrast to several others, which he categorically rejected or even paid back, remains uncertain. So I’m not going to mention any of this here, but rather limit myself to the nice surprise moments that he always has ready for his friends.

This was the case with the very first documentary film that we shot with him. Fee as was customary at the time: 1000 DM. Which, however, inevitably had to be plastered in the most expensive bar in Paris, the “Lasserre”. At the time he was living at the Porte d’Auteuil in Paris, poorly furnished and not a great area. Peter says aphoristically: “The interior of today’s human corresponds exactly to the impotent geometry of such places.” Then the way to school with the six-year-old daughter Amina. Thereby unmistakable love and tenderness.

Amina’s mother, the Austrian actress (he will only ever live with actresses), has already separated from him. Later, alone in the apartment, he complains that female admirers run into him: “I don’t understand what they want. Only yesterday another one who lugged her suitcase straight away and set up the toothbrush in the bathroom. Of course I expelled her. ”“ I’m an impossible father ”, he announces next, while he cooks for her … full article

Erin walks in on Grant and Tayla having sex | Love Island Australia 2018

About Love Island Australia: Pulses will be racing as Sophie Monk hosts the ultimate game of love, romance and lust. Monk will set viewers’ hearts pounding as she takes a group of sexy young Aussie singles in search of the ultimate summer of love and lust to the island of Majorca in Spain. Which of the islanders will set the heatwave soaring? Remain loveable and, most importantly, in love? Love Island Australia airs Sunday – Thursday on 9Go! (Channel 93 | Foxtel Channel 139) and 9Now.… full article

This Brazilian model married herself

Brazilian Woman

Getting married to yourself sounds bizarre. For the influencer Cris Galêra, there is no narcissism or a lack of potential relationship partners behind this step. Your message is very different.

BrideFor many people, their own wedding is one of the most important days in life and should usher in a new phase of life. Ideally, the bond with the partner lasts forever. The Brazilian model Cris Galêra has also sworn eternal loyalty to the most important person in her life in Sao Paulo: namely herself.

The influencer has around 175,000 subscribers on Instagram, to whom she gives insights into her everyday model life. All the more surprising for her Instagram community that the 33-year-old suddenly posted a photo of herself in her wedding dress and announced: “ I said ‘yes’! “Because before that, the influencer hadn’t made any suggestion that she was in a relationship.

The Brazilian explains how the wedding came about

LimaHowever, the text next to her post enlightened her subscribers. You have joined the sologamy movement. This relationship model includes people who set themselves the goal of marrying themselves or only having a relationship with themselves. Sometimes these people also refer to themselves as autosexual.

Galêra also explains that this step is to celebrate their self-love and inspire other women to increase their self-esteem. She adds ironically:

“I WON’T GET A DIVORCE ANYTIME SOON.”

amy-eltingYour fans are very positive about the move. In addition to the many congratulations, she also received dozens of declarations of love including plans to marry. However, she will certainly not accept these offers anytime soon. After all, the model is already taken to herself, she jokes.

The ceremony is symbolic

Because even if Galêra poses in front of a church in a white dress with a bridal bouquet, the vow to her is not legally binding. In Brazil, too, only two people are allowed to enter into a marriage covenant. Marriage for everyone has existed there since 2013. In Germany, too, supporters of sologamy cannot officially marry themselves and have to resort to a free marriage.

Nevertheless, the influencer is not alone. Her compatriot, the top model Adriana Lima, already said yes to herself in May 2017.

The first to deal scientifically with auto-sexuality or auto-eroticism was the sexologist Haverlock Ellis, who established in his work “Studies in the Psychology of Sex” as early as 1897 that there are people who can only fulfill their sexuality through themselves. Even then, he dared to predict that auto-sexuality will increase.

dakotaBut is that true – will more and more people marry themselves?
Dr. Heinz-Jürgen Voss, Professor of Sexology and Sexual Education at the Merseburg University of Applied Sciences, sees it in a more differentiated way, as he explains in an interview . Nowadays it is true that society is generally more open about the topic of sexuality. Ten years ago, sexual orientation and self-determination apart from the heteronormative, monogamous form of relationship were largely taboo.

But at the same time there are more and more diverse views on these topics and new discourses automatically arise. However, this sometimes leads to contradictions:

IT CURRENTLY APPEARS TO BE PARTICULARLY PARADOXICAL THAT IDENTITIES AND CATEGORIES ARE EMPHASIZED MORE STRONGLY WITH THE NAMING OF INDIVIDUAL NEEDS. BUT THAT SEEMS TO ME TO BE A TRANSITION PHASE.
HEINZ-JÜRGEN VOSS,Professor of Sexology at the Merseburg University of Applied Sciences  

There are no official figures on how many of these self-weddings take place or have taken place so far, as the connection is not legally binding. What is striking in this context, however, is that almost exclusively women are associated with autosexuality or sologamy – or they openly report about it.

Sologamy as a modern act of liberation

That doesn’t full article